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A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that ‘individuality’ is the key to success.
Robert Orben

Turning 50 last year changed very little, in fact it just legitimised some of the behaviours I couldn’t blame on being blonde, instead I got to put it down to age too.

I think the age thing didn’t matter to me, because unlike much older people in society I am still seen, by both my community and world. Because there comes a time when I will not be, old age tends to be seen as getting in the way, respect is hard earned and easily lost in a young persons world – if you don’t think so ask a pensioner.

For now I fend of that time by appreciating my life. And I am doing OK too, yesterday I graduated and got a MBA at Newcastle University, a old well respected university, full of history (including Martin L King!).

Not going to university never bothered me, other than I had fancied being a irresponsible student, so I never hankered over graduating, so here I was actually not looking forward to the ceremony. I felt too old for what I considered a experience meant for a younger person. But as I had been lucky enough to get a scholarship and I had enjoyed every minute of the two year course, including the moaning of assignment and deadlines, I was always going to be there, even it was just to say thank you and goodbye to some of the pretty awesome people I met along the way. From the course director who offered me the scholarship giving me a day to say yes! The good Lecturers, some very supportive (and some not so much), my very interesting mentor Peter Shaw who writes great spiritual leadership books and finally, but very importantly, my fabulous class mates. All younger than me, some by a year, most by 7/8yrs and more, but all clever, fun and generous people.

Sitting in the regal Kings Hall I glanced up and spotted a portrait of my Chairwoman Lady O watching over me (having recently resigned from being Chair of the Uni herself)this made me smile as I remembered how worried I was about who would come with me to this ceremony. Both my sons would be away, could I coax friends into sitting in a place which is usually occupied by proud parents? There were people I would love to have been there, including my own parents but couldn’t be, but I am blessed by having incredible friends and son number 2 is now back. So in the end I was wonderfully supported by Lady L and BB who made sure I got spoilt, and the New York Boys who sampled the free Cava several times a hour!!

The day turned out to be a graduation in more ways for me, not because I got the certificate (no t-shirts, which I think is a mistake in this modern world), or the chance to add 3 extra letters after my name but because I remembered what I had been taught about being a real person (the stuff you don’t get certificates for).
My parents were proud of me even without a degree, they knew that pride in others is for other things, such as treating people with respect and compassion, seeing needs and helping them fulfil them, making them feel special, showing you love them for who they are and not expecting them to change to suit you, knowing my own worth and ultimately being honest with myself and others even if at the time it hurts.

So as I appreciated the happy times of being with my classmates, the hours spent learning topics and sharing tales of their lives, their pitfall and triumphs, all different and hopeful, I vowed I would practice the things my first educators ( my mum and dad) taught me.

I know real education doesn’t begin and end in school, it starts when we first learn to breathe and ends when our body takes its last breath. What happens in between is the real education and it only works if we listen and apply what we think at the time is the right learning. Unfortunately with these lessons we can never be sure whether it’s a pass or fail, we just have to wait to get the final graduation. No guarantees, in fact the only thing for sure is that it will sometimes feel like a hard slog, and there will be scars gained to prove you were in attendance and that you tried your best even if your best wasn’t good enough…….