It’s all about perspectives……

We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.
Abraham Lincoln

Yesterday I went to the art auction in our city’s Cathedral. I must go into this place at least once a week (for lunch), I have even hired the rooms for monthly meetings back in 2008, when our building was too small to all meet. I felt great about taking all the team to church each month, hoping the Big Guy would appreciate that I was at least trying to spread the Word, even if most of the team just thought it was just a cool place to meet. Yesterday when I went with my artistic friend Lady LM, I somehow saw it differently. I noticed lots of new and interesting things, I couldn’t believe I had never noticed them before and wondered why.

Overnight I have decided its about perspective as much as interest being different on the day. Yesterday I wasn’t in a hurry or busy chatting, I became interested in my surroundings, even though they were the same old (really old) place I am used to. I noticed the sign on the door of the main entrance, which was beautiful and said ” Push”, ( apparently Cathedral doors are always on the West side – this blog is not just my ramblings it can be educational too – well sort of). To me the sign seemed bigger than before, actually I am not even sure I had noticed it before. But yesterday it seemed loud and clear, and somehow instructional to me personally. As my life is currently changing, and I am both sad and unsettled at the moment, ‘pushing’ through is all I think I can do.

And maybe my whole view of the Cathedral was due to a change in my own perspective. I think perspective is one of the most important things in life. My current situation means that I really hurt a friend. Which I hate, the only one regret in my life is those times when I have hurt people with my actions or lack of them. My friend retaliated and hurt me back which is how we humans react, hurt people – hurt people. All of this due to our perspectives of the situation not being the same, even if we had wanted it to be – we can’t change who we are. CS Lewis said “For what you see and hear depends a good deal on where you are standing: it also depends on what sort of person you are”, we are just standing in different places.

But was hurting each other really necessary if it is just a different perspective? I am not sure, maybe because things are important to us and they carry a lot of strong feelings, love, anger, hate etc. But even strong feeling don’t always change perspectives or people.

My last photo of the day was of a man sat quietly giving thanks to God for his day, asking for forgiveness for whatever he had done himself. While I didn’t sit alongside him, my friend and I have asked for each other’s forgiveness on what we have done and I have asked God for His forgiveness too, I can only be sure of forgiveness from one of them…as in the end it’s all about perspective…

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.
Og Mandino

Casualties of living……,

If you look up the meaning of life on the Internet the answers are all sorts of religious, scientific, humorous and basically confusing twaddle. No one answer, no right answer either. We are left scratching our heads, it’s unanswered. So I have been thinking (surprising) as my life goes through a untypical emergency stop procedure. Here I try to make some sense of it, even if I don’t have the foggiest about its meaning.

Leaving the big question to others I ask what is the meaning of my own life?? and why do I struggle???

Again I read, think, talk, talk, talk (always more talk than anything) and pray about it but I am still stumped.

All I can think about is that my life is the period between my birth and death in which I get a chance to love, learn and add value to others. Is this my meaning – maybe! I do know my biggest struggle is when I fail at any of those 3 things, and fail miserably I do. Please don’t think I mind failing, (hear my heart on this), No I don’t see failure as such a bad thing, in fact its an important part of learning, it also helps me recognise Joy when it comes (and it does more than I deserve). So its not the failures, that messes me up. No – It’s those that I hurt while I do it I can’t cope with. Learning to forgive is important they say if you want to live a full life, but I think understanding forgiveness is learnt best, when you are the person who needs the forgiveness. Add to that the people you know that you have hurt as well as those you don’t even know you have. Such are the affects of our actions (I think they call it the ‘butterfly affect’) have on others.

One of my top ten favourite books is ‘The 5 people you meet in heaven’ by Mitch Albom, it is a book that helps you understand the affect you have on others (and they have on you) during your life and says you get peace from understanding these things after you die and go to Heaven (its fiction). It says “That’s what Heaven is. You get to make sense of your yesterdays”

During my emergency stop in life, I looked at this little book again and spotted somethings that help.

“That’s the thing. Sometimes when you sacrifice something precious, you’re not really losing it. You’re just passing it on to someone else.” As I have mentioned letting go of people is hard for me, so (I hope this is true Mitch), although my Dad would have said a similar thing I am sure.

But it’s this little bit that sticks with me today, it says

“All endings are also beginnings. We just don’t know it at the time.”

I really hope in my life the casualties are few and forgiving, and that for all of us the beginnings become clear soon. Waiting till we get to Heaven is a bit drastic even for me……